Monday, August 24, 2009

Daddy do it

For some time now I've wanted to give my husband a true taste of what I do all day every day. I often rattle off 15 tasks I've accomplished in the evening and hope for a standing ovation. Come on, no one could get all that done in one day and live to talk about it. Instead he gives me something such as, "that's good." I sigh and finish eating the supper that took an hour to make because my two-year-old insisted that she wanted to get undressed or requested a book be read or just came over to throw a tantrum for no reason. Tacos shouldn't take an hour to make, right?

I must add that he is a wonderful husband and does everything he can for our family to provide for us. He helps me at night when he can, even though he works long hours. He always get our daughter ready for bed and reads her stories. I have no complaints. I do however think he sometimes thinks my job as a SAHM is relaxed or not that challenging.

So yesterday I decided to leave for most of the day. I would much rather sleep and lounge around the house for a day off, but our little girl is pretty demanding these days. The only way to truly get a break is to leave. I left in the morning for about 3 hours and for 2 1/2 hours in the afternoon. I left a list for my husband to "complete." I knew it wouldn't get done -- even on a perfect day one or two things couldn't get finished with the little girl who doesn't like to nap during the day or be alone at night.

Here's the list:
  • 3 loads of laundry -- I sorted and even started one load before I left, one load was just sheets off the bed
  • Vacuum
  • Mop
  • Clean the bathroom
  • Run to the store (he needed sunflower seeds and only gets them at a certain store)
  • Play outside
  • Feed lunch at noon -- ABC spaghetti, peas, oranges
  • Start nap at 1 p.m.
I left at 9 a.m. I thought about maybe sabotaging something, such as jamming up the diaper pail or putting a color shirt in the whites. But I didn't think that would be fair. Turned out the washer stopped working during the second load. It has an imbalance problem that if it has too much water it won't work. So, my husband said he had to hook up the landlord's washer. I figure he lost about a half hour because of that.

When I stopped at home around 12:30 p.m. to put away some groceries I bought at Whole Foods (I never get there because I have to label read and my impatient toddler sometimes makes that hard). He told me he was a little behind. As far as I could see nothing was done. He told me about the washer. Then he held up the list and said "I couldn't find peas or oranges, so she had peaches and a vegetable medley." Made me laugh. No big deal. Peas and oranges were just a guideline. I did see he got to the vacuuming.

I reminded him that our daughter needed some outside time yet. I left shortly after and ran to a couple more stores. Seems like when I get the energy and the freedom to do it, I got to as many as I can. Didn't spend a whole lot, but got some things we needed. Sometimes it's about the shopping and not the buying. I returned home around 3 p.m. and my husband was still sitting on the floor in our daughter's room trying to put her down for nap. Guess she didn't want to nap. Later the truth comes out they both fell asleep on the rocking chair. He said she fell asleep twice and she wouldn't let him leave the room. So, the laundry wasn't done, the bathroom didn't get cleaned, he didn't run to the store. He proudly told me he got the floor mopped. We tackled the rest for the tasks and a couple more for the rest of the day. When we were eating supper I asked if he made the bed. He said "I didn't know that was part of laundry." All I could do was laugh.

I can only hope that he got a little better understanding after his "day in the life of a stay-at-home parent."

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